Personal Reflections | the power of your mind

i feel like the goal of yoga is to become more peaceful, more in tune with your own light, more self-aware and in turn to become more peaceful in the way you engage with others (and the world) around you. sometimes it is easy to be peaceful, harmonious, happy with the world around us – when things are going well. but we are only human. we fall off the wagon sometimes. we snap, we flinch, we react to situations with sharp minds and quick tongues rather than taking a breath to be present in this moment, this moment that will never occur again. we have choices to make in how we react to situations every single day of our lives and how we react to these situations determines how we will be remembered in this world. sometimes, as we are only human, we react in ways that are not showing our best light. in ways that are snappy, unnecessary, reactive. tonight for no reason, i have been feeling irritable. for no reason i have felt  irritable and i have let myself become reactionary to situations, to words, to events. and now i sit with the irritability inside me, festering. i have two choices in this – i can, as is human, let this feeling, in my house, in my mind, in my heart, in the space between me and my husband, or – I can choose to let it go.

it sounds like an easy choice to make. because of course who would choose to sit with these feelings when one can simply let them go. be free of them, disengage with them, lighten your own load. but what makes letting go so difficult, is the human ego – because ‘letting go’ is saying, i have over-reacted, i have become irritable when i shouldn’t have, i have not been the best version of myself. letting go of the feeling, is letting go of the ego. letting go of the ego is letting go of pride. to be big enough to be small in that moment of letting go, to be humbled – by your own self.

my husband is out getting some dinner for us, and in this moment, I am choosing to take three deep breaths and to let this feeling go, to let go of everything in this day that has passed and every irritable feeling that is sitting with me. because it is my choice to let those feelings take over this mind and this heart and it is my choice to let them go. to let them go completely, not to cling onto the remnants of them for my ego’s sake, but to truly breathe out and let go. because why wouldn’t i?


Personal Reflections | Reiki

i had my first Reiki healing session with Colleen about a month ago. Needless to say, I was super skeptical about the whole process. She began the treatment with a body massage and then moved onto the Reiki and Sound Healing after that. She began the Reiki session by holding a pendulum over my body and moving down from my crown to my feet – hovering over the different Chakras in my body – to ascertain which of those were blocked and which were flowing freely.

as the pendulum approached my Throat Chakra, it began swinging backwards and forward rather than in a circle as it is meant to – indicating that it is blocked. (Which, “co-incidentally” is the same Chakra that I was drawn to based on the symbol alone). I had mentioned me choosing the Throat Chakra on my personal blog at some stage and the skeptic in me instantly wondered if Colleen had maybe just picked up on that.

she then drew the pendulum over my Heart Chakra and it began to swing in big round looping circles, leaning to one side – which Colleen explained is the female side of my body. Having the pendulum swing over my heart so wildly indicates to her that I have a very strong Heart Chakra – that I am an Empath, I absorb emotions of others and am sensitive and intuitive to their needs.

after learning more about the state of the Chakras and energy zones in my body, Colleen then administered the Reiki, she also used a combination of sound healing incorporating Tibetan Singing bowls – which vibrates within every cell of your body and feels amazing.

i can’t really explain how it made me feel – it wasn’t anything earth shattering or wildly explosive, i just felt calmer. more peaceful. more at one with the world. the grass outside looked greener and fresher and i just felt an overall sense of content.

since then, i came back to london and it has been about 3 weeks since i last saw colleen in south africa. in the middle of the week two weeks ago, i had an all fall down day. everything was terrible. i was feeling lonely – far away from my husband, far away from myself. i felt unhappy and irritable and things starting feeling stressful and overwhelming. i was starting to get snappy and horrible to be around – which is hard considering i spend most of my days by myself. it really was one of those days. without any warning or any other mention of how i was feeling, i suddenly received a message from colleen via twitter saying, “i think you need a top up”. i burst into tears right then and there. it was all so overwhelming how she could possibly have known how much i needed to get back to that feeling of calm, of balance of restored peace. and it came at exactly the right time.

i am converted.